One Ring
He took me on a hike. He explained that's where he went to pray about marrying me. Then Matthew said, "I asked one person a question here... now I want to ask you a question." He got down on one knee, and the rest is history! The ring was 25 cents from a little vending machine. haha
Two People
Matthew and I are SO different, but not opposite as most people explain... A peach is not opposite of a dime, they are just supremely different. We came from two very different families, we followed different rules and we had different expectations of eachother... yet, here we are. :)
I took an opportunity recently to read my journal around the time we became engaged and were newlywed. I threw the L word around a LOT. "I love him so much," "I'm so grateful for the love we have," "I am so in love!" I laugh at that girl now. The emotion of love is not what keeps a marriage going, it's the motion of love - truly an action word. I am happy to say when I express, "I love you," to Matthew now... it is a mountain of feelings, gratitude, partnership and faith all in ONE!
We were planning on starting kids after I had a degree. We changed our minds after a few months of marriage and I'm so glad we did! As great as it is to have time to get to know each other, it's mind-blowing how MUCH love one heart is capable of holding. Matthew and I are pretty good parents. We don't pretend to be perfect, because we are SO READY for bed time when it comes - but we love these precious spirits entrusted to us and they have blessed us tremendously!
We dated in a Ford Thunderbird. Our very first car was a Honda Civic hatchback - about ready to fall apart! Then we had a Kia Optima, then a Kia Sedona (mini van) for our growing family. Having children and trying to get to two places at once is hard! A couple years ago, we got a scooter. It's fun to have, our oldest two boys get rides and I enjoy the air blowing around me as I drive at night alone. The van and scooter are completely paid off and we have been pretty good at managing finances... okay, Matthew has been good at managing finances and I support him in it! haha
Those that know Matthew and I from the start know we were separated for six months in a rough time in our lives. He did not want to move out of his mother's house after our 2 month trial period in East Amherst, New York. Before we got there - I said me and the kids will go back to Utah if we don't get a place of our own after 60 days. I'm a woman of my word. Living with parents when you're marriage is full of holes isn't the greatest idea. I went through a little version of Hell living apart with 2 kids on my own. I had two jobs, one being graveyard so I could see my children during the day. I was ready to throw in the towel and had the divorce papers filled out. Matthew changed as a man and I also became a more patient wife. When Matthew came back to Utah, our marriage was better than I could dream. We have been strong and happy ever since. There are so many things I could guess that helped. But, I'll tell you this... somewhere in that 6 months, a miracle took place.
Seven Peaks
We have something called the Pass of all Passes - here in Utah. It gets us into many venues at no extra cost once you buy the pass. A few years ago, a company I worked for treated employees and their families to a day at Seven Peaks... so many of the water slides were out of order, and the one Matthew waited in line for was basically the slowest slide there! He hated it and never wanted to go back. I was so frustrated, it was like him judging a restaurant by the worst dish on a bad day. With the pass, I'd been going with the kids a lot by myself. Finally, I convinced him to go again. He had a blast! I made him acknowledge he misjudged it and apologize. haha We went again as a family for my birthday celebration and he took turns with the boys on the BIG slides and we just had so much fun. I tie this place into our "story" because it's far from monumental and far from perfect. But the time together with the sole purpose of having fun is priceless and it doesn't hurt to give something your spouse enjoys a 2nd chance.
Eight New Years Fights
Something random. It's super hard for us to have a great New Year's Eve. Seriously, New Year's Eve between us is cursed. It's like the day we let it all out. Whether we are alone or with others, we do NOT get along on New Years! I remember ONE that we didn't fight. Hopefully that changes now. So odd - better on New Year's Eve than New Year's Day, right? Start it off with apologies?! ;)
I am crying right now at the end of this. I have so many emotions flowing over me. As an individual, I have SO MUCH growing to do. I know I can be a better woman, mother and wife. Still, our marriage is phenomenal. Matthew was laid off at the beginning of July and didn't get a new job until the beginning of August. There were a couple vacation-like days where we were lazy, a couple days I was like, "dude, can you wash a dish?!" and a couple where I was like, "wow, I need my space back." BUT I am so shocked at the bond I was able to observe between the kids, Matthew and I.... Our family works! The kids are helpful and obedient (not perfect, but can't ask for better!), the parents understand each other. If I need or want something, I get it or ask for it instead of hope Matthew offers it or reads my mind - women seriously need to stop that. Matthew applied himself, besides job hunting, to being on top of his chores and more around the house. We spent time together as a family and also split up with the kids to offer the other parent some space. The shocker is the fact that when Matthew's first day of work came, we MISSED each other!!! That is what people mean when they say they married their best friend. I married a man I fell for and he became my best friend. I love him so much and I choose HIM to spend time with. We're in this thing for eternity and I can't wait to see what comes next!!!
Just in case you were wondering, we've been married for 3,292 days. We are so blessed. Here's to a million more!
